May 8th, 2008
the power of silence
"Don’t underestimate the value of doing nothing,
of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering."
- Pooh Bear
Lately I’ve been criticised for being silent. The truth is that sometimes I don’t take personal calls and I don’t reply to personal messages. This is largely as a result of being faced with the need to make difficult decisions, together with the desire to avoid doing something which may hurt someone or be regretted later. That this is interpreted as selfish and mean makes no sense to me. Since I have evidence that Pooh understands the power of silence and the value of doing nothing, why is it so offensive to you?
related writing:
Perhaps because we are human and humans are not always as wise and spiritual and free of fear and doubt as we should be? Just a guess.
William F. DeVault’s last blog post..and now for something completely mercurial
Oh, bother!
Love the pooh-ism … and I do this too, to what everyone else considers a fault … the not answering, the no telling, the just being silent. It is necessary at times, to be sure.
I agree with you and pooh.
-a
I have to agree with Anne (and Candy and pooh), and if anything I have said over the last month has come across as criticism of you for your alone time, I wish to apologize fully, publicly and completely, with all proper grovelling, sackcloth and self-flagellation.
Sometimes I wish life was as simple as a children’s story.
Love you, peacat.
silly billy-bear
William F. DeVault’s last blog post..The Eight Irresistible Principles of Fun
Why? Because when Candy is silent it pisses me off.
Well, yah, me too, Max…but I have learned to never get too angry with anyone who can destroy my universe with a word.
I mean, the woman claims to wear my cajones on a chain around her neck!
But she is right, in all things the silent or “absent” side has a moral or at least cultural ascendency. People can’t call the cops on you for being too quiet, y’know.
Now I will follow her lead and shut up for a bit before I say something unfortunate. (stapling tongue to roof of mouth)
William’s last blog post..beginning the process of fun
The problem with silence is, it’s left to be interpreted entirely by the ears that it falls on. There have been times when my “quietness” was interpreted as rudeness by others, and I have been guilty of connecting someones silence to their feelings (or lack there of) of me.
In both cases, the misinterpretation led to consequences that a simple, open conversation could have avoided. Silence has taken everything I hold dear in this world, and now, silence is all that is left.
Candy has presence. She doesn’t have to say anything to make an impact.
Candy also seems to enjoy re-inventing herself, as this constantly changing blog testifies to.
Actually this blog looks like candy at the moment.
*LiCk*
Richard Catto’s last blog post..Should Hillary Clinton pack it in?
Jim, you make your point, and cleanly. We are all victims of our own assumptions, few truths make it through without some prejudices or the taint of past experiences. Dr. McCroskey was right in pointing out that feedback is the most important element in the human communication dynamics, for without it we have no idea if we are communicating, or what the message is that is being received. We then have to depend on secondary cues, if they even exist!
Richard, I agree, the new layout is definitely a side of Candy we’d missed of late. Very tasty. She is a wonderfully complex woman. Will be glad when she fixes my blog.
William’s last blog post..On reflection
i liked that opening quote Candy, it’s such a simple statement, but man, the meaning behind it…
The reason for this comment now, is that it has stuck on me the whole day, since the morning, trying to figure my brains out on how to interpret it, and this is how:
Listen to what people are saying. If you really have to reply, then do it… otherwise, just listen, and no don’t do nothing, rather listen— and learn!!!
Thanks for the add on Facebook!!!
I am not offended.. I am subscribed by email and when i get a post I am happy to read it
)
I surrender. I surrender.
No mas.
(thud)
William’s last blog post..new poem: draw from me
A quotation by Abraham Lincoln, “I would not be bothered by what others are saying as long as I know it does not speak the truth of me.” I certainly agree in the power of silence.
BK’s last blog post..United for a Good Cause
You know I love silence because you can learn so much from it! If you are speaking you are not learning because you are only saying what you already know. If you start listening then you will learn from others.
I admire people who can be silent without being uncomfortable with it, but I know it sometimes makes people uncomfortable to be around them.
Look, Listen and then you will Learn
frostygirl’s last blog post..CHINA IGNORED NATURES WARNING